How to be Daring

Today is Calvin's & my "2 Month-A-versary". While initially, some of you will consider this lame since 2 months in isn't really something to brag about, I choose to celebrate monthly for the first year of anything.

While nothing BIG is planned, I still recognized it verbally when the clock struck midnight last night. Calvin reminded me it really wasn't 'legal' until tonight but it doesn't matter. He was cute enough to recognize our "123 A-versary" (our wedding date is 12.3 so on 1.23 he gave me a rose and a really sweet card).

Two paragraphs in & I promise I realize how nauseating I'm being. Sorry. I'll press on.

Back at my bridal shower in October, I received an unexpected gift from my mom: the movie Fireproof and a copy of The Love Dare (this particular version is a year-long daily devotional for couples). I read Fireproof last year, so I was familiar with the premise of TLD but interested to see how they span a 40-day dare over a year for couples to do together.

Calvin and I committed to start the book after the 1st of the year. To date (it's Feb 3), we're on day 26. In our defense, there have been nights spent apart and others where I'm asleep way before he comes to bed. Also... I'm proud of us for getting this far. We're doing it and even in only 26 days, we're growing.

This book gives us some daily insight, a nibble of scripture, and either discussion provoking questions or a dare (or prayer) for the week. For example: this week's dare is to demonstrate patience by saying nothing negative to your spouse (it's better to hold your tongue than say something you'll regret). So far, so good. At the end of each lesson, we pray together.

In my life, over the last few years especially, I've witnessed the power of prayer. I had NO IDEA how that would translate in my marriage but let me just tell you, it is changing us SO much for the better and quickly. Seriously. If you don't pray daily with your partner, you should start.

Anyway... This devo has inspired me in the month of February to take things a step further. With Valentine's Day approaching and our honeymoon on the horizon, I wanted to do something special since I have the ability to love on my husband in a more daily capacity.

While I realize we're still very much in the 'honeymoon phase', I feel my actions this month go above & beyond anything I would do for him regularly. What you need to keep in mind is we've dated for over 3 years at this point. Yes, technically, we're still newlyweds, but there's not really anything NEW about our relationship (except the whole 'same name' & 'same address' deal).

My personal dare: To find ways to make Calvin feel loved in the 14 days leading up to Valentine's Day. Today is Day 3 and from what I can conclude, he hasn't quite caught on yet but that's also kind of the point. I wanted to do little things each day - different from things I already do - for him to experience that kind of gooey Feb 14 mush longer than just one day.

Here's what I've been up to:

On Wednesday, I tucked a pink note into his lunchbox he would later find (and instead of discarding, he brought it back to me in said lunchbox). On Thursday, I wrapped the blue sticky note around a single serve bottle of Red Diamond sweet tea - something else he would find in his lunch. The sticky note came home in the lunchbox too. I'm going to make M&M cookies (his favorite) to take with us to Lubbock this weekend... I'll wrap one up for him that he'll get tomorrow while we're at the hotel; the rest will go with us to a BBQ we're attending. Today he'll return home to find a pillow I made:

Pinterest inspired; I took some of the lyrics of our song/first dance and made a pillow for them to go on. Seems fitting on something of an anniversary... He has loved this song for years - he's actually the one who introduced me to it so it's not just some sappy love song I picked.

Here's the thing: so far, this project is costing me very little. I had the paper and the stuffing for the pillow. Sweet tea? Less than $.80. Fabric for the pillow? $.75 for half a yard at WalMart. The paint pen cost a little over $3 and the bag of M&M's were $2.68. Other things Calvin will find over the remaining 11 days:

Homemade Honeybee bookmarks. Also Pinterest inspired. I bought the Honeybee stamp (Martha Stewart collection) on a clearance rack at Ross for $3.99 with a store credit I had a couple months ago. On Pinterest, they used the free paint sample strips in pinks & reds & stamped them with hearts to give as Valentine gifts. I chose grays and yellows for Honeybee reasons but anyone who knows us knows I've called Calvin my Honeybee since the beginning. Currently we use our photographer's business cards as bookmarks (they have some of our engagement photos on them - we're absolute narcissists) and I think these will make good replacements. Cost to make them? Free. Since I already had the stamp...

Something else he'll find:

This man's boxer collection has grown leaps & bounds in the time he's known me. I love underwear. People who are close to me always get underwear as gifts and know I love something comfy from Victoria's Secret any day of the week. When Calvin and I first started dating, his boxers were solid colors, plaids, stripes, and checks. He now owns hearts, lobsters, citrus fruits, beer mugs, shamrocks, fish bones, and an ongoing assortment of fun underwear. I am a HUGE advocate of fun underwear. My favorite place to shop for his shorts is Old Navy - I recently bought these on sale 2 for $11.50 (normally $8.50 apiece) and am holding on to the second pair (turquoise with little red crabs on them) for his birthday next month. Again... purchased with a store credit I had. No money left my wallet.

Note: Please don't think I'm cheap - especially when it comes to Calvin. We're newlyweds on a budget and darn it, if I can save a few bucks, I'm gonna do it. Not to mention, we have an expensive trip coming up, his birthday is next month, and if I'm going to commit to 14 little Valentines, they're going to be budget-friendly. I digress.

To keep myself organized, I made a list of what I'm doing for him each day. I have to be careful in my planning because food is always SUCH an easy give but Calvin reserves sweets for the weekends only and sweets are the easiest thing to find in February! This is why I've had to get creative with paper goods and pillows... Anyway, later today I'll venture to Dunkin Donuts. This month, they're making heart-shaped sprinkle donuts (one of Calvin's all-time FAVORITE sweets) that I will bring home, tuck in a Ziploc, and present to him on Sunday morning while we're in Lubbock. If you'll remember, tomorrow's goodie is the M&M cookie and since we're also out of town next weekend, my little list has required quite a bit of planning.

Other things on the list: a framed wedding photo for his office (something we just discussed a few nights ago), a Valentine card, the boxer shorts, SweetTarts, a heart-shaped lunch (I got heart cookie-cutters for $1.47 at WalMart to cut the shape out and imprint smaller hearts in the bread of his sandwich one day next week), mini cheesecakes (a recipe I got from Nabisco Nilla Wafter FB page), ending our two weeks on Feb 14 at Across the Pond (formerly The Original Joe's on 26) for dinner. Across the Pond is where we had our rehearsal dinner.

The full dare I've given myself is to love this man deeply. I don't ever - EVER - want a day to go by where he doubts or questions the way I feel about him and our marriage. Sure, this 14 day deal is short-term and early in our marriage, but he'll remember it. And I know I'm setting the bar high for myself by doing this, but I won't treat our marriage like something I'll have all the time in the world for - God has plans for us on this earth and I can't plan on the next 50 years. God might bless us with that but if something were to happen tomorrow, I'll know I loved him as best I could today.

Happy Valentine's Month :)