He calls me his Domestic Goddess -

Calvin & I have always been social people. I always get excited about attending weddings, getting groups together to go out, standing around after Sunday School to visit forever before the group decides to go to lunch so we can continue the conversation...

We were always hugely social -

And then we got married.

Suddenly, as much as I didn't think it would, we LIKE staying home. We ENJOY sitting on the couch (which we did plenty of BEFORE marriage). We sometimes bemoan obligations or things we've committed to - to the extent of asking the other if we HAVE to go (usually he asks me & I say yes, we HAVE to go).

I tell people married life isn't so different - except for my last name and new address. And he has throw pillows now. And clean clothes. And sheets. And dishes.

The weekend we got married, we had house guests. Everyone went home on Sunday with the exception of his brother & sister-in-law, who spent the night with us before they headed home on Monday. Since then, we've hosted no one. No one came for dinner, no one visited for the weekend... Our friends broke in to deliver a belated wedding gift (our new TV!) which was embarrassing because the house was still in transition - which they were all understanding & non-judgmental about (like good friends are).

Still, we hid out in our little haven of a home because it was cozy & our dogs never complain.

Until 2 weeks ago. The organization I work for was hosting the annual dinner & auction and my parents wanted to come and attend. "Sure! I'd love that!" was my initial response. Then I realized that meant they'd stay with us. In our home. Our home that has a guest room AND a guest bath. Both of which needed cleaning & organizing.

Fortunately, I had time to get it together. And I did. And it was actually wonderful - not a stressful visit where I worried about who would sleep where and for the first time, I could have guests and not give up my OWN bed!!

We had a blessed visit, a great weekend, and all I had to do when they left was wash the sheets because Easter weekend, Calvin's dad came through town and spent the night with us.

For what seems like the last 2 years or so, Calvin's dad Brian has been in & out of Dallas doctor offices dealing with his replacement knee. Every time he comes through town, he has to stay in a hotel. Now that he's finally got a good thing going with this knee, he's approaching retirement and beginning construction on their new home on a chunk of property in Missouri. He was going to drive through last night & today to spend the week at the property when Calvin suggested he stay with us. Since that hadn't been an option before, it was a welcome offer. I tidied the house and planned out our Easter meal.

The meal in itself was worthy of it's own blog entry, so I'll not go in to many details. I will, however, post a photo of my successful & delicious tenderloin:

We even ate dinner at the table! Brian was excited to see a peach cobbler on the stove for dessert. After, he told me I could spend the next 20 years or so perfecting it whenever he was around :)

Brian left this morning when Calvin went off to work. I have sheets to clean again since we have more house guests arriving Thursday!

In all this, I've realized what a blessing it is to have family to entertain. To have a home with a spare room, to be loved enough for people to want to visit. When I was growing up, I never understood why washing sheets, having food in the pantry, and keeping a tidy home was such a big deal. Now, I get it. I want our home to be the kind of place ready for friends to gather at any time. I want the bathroom to be clean, the kitchen to be tidy, and the living room to be free of clutter so we can invite people over after church if we want, or host guests any weekend at a moment's notice.

Calvin's mom & her husband will be with us this weekend so we can attend his granddad's 80th birthday party together. I'll be baking the cake and am looking forward to experimenting with more recipes.

The weekend after, his sister, brother-in-law, and our niece & nephew will spend Friday night with us. I'm sure the kids will be asleep by the time I roll in from the airport, but I'll get a few fun minutes with them Saturday morning before they leave.

Growing up & doing this whole "domestic" thing has definitely been an eye-opener. I thank my mom more often now for teaching me about laundry, cleaning, cooking, and entertaining. My husband thinks it's cute when he comes home to find me dirty, sweaty, and gross, cleaning our bathroom. He thinks it's cuter when I'm trying a new recipe and getting excited over how things taste in the process. 

I never thought I'd be the woman who enjoys lighting candles and grocery shopping but here I sit, in domestic bliss. But the goddess part? I don't know about all that...

That's What I Like About Texas

I have officially lived in Texas for 5.5 years. In the fall of '06, I made the decision to leave Michigan - I packed up my belongings and headed south for the Lonestar State (while making a brief stop in Atlanta to visit some awesome friends).

This May, I'll be able to say 2 of those 5.5 years have been lived out as a resident of Ft Worth. Gotta love that, right?

Recently, I left a status update on Facebook declaring my love for the avocado. While my Michigan friends were quick to reply that we DO see avocado in MI, I want to clarify that my affection came to fruition in Texas. Growing up, we rarely explored many "new" or "exotic" foods - and you certainly didn't see guacamole in Mexican restaurants.

No, my love for things like avocado & queso has grown in more recent years, after discovering which fresh, more local ingredients make food that much more awesome. My love is even greater now that I can pick good avocados at the store and make some delicious guacamole at home. And not just avocado - you can get decent produce here all year!! That doesn't happen in MI...

Which brings me to a Facebook message exchange from back in the fall. As the wedding was drawing near, my aunt Joy wrote and wanted to know 5-10 things I LOVE about Texas. I will share that list with you here, but I want to also include a list of things I LOVE about Michigan for all my Yankee Doodle darlings :)

Texas (my list, verbatim & in no particular order):
1. sweet tea & BBQ
2. football
3. cute dresses & cowboy boots
4. FT WORTH
5. country dancing (half & 2-stepping)
6. cotton fields
7. Blue Bell ice cream
8. the weather
9. Texas country music
10. Billy Bob's (the world's largest honky tonk!)

Michigan (my list, dreamed up right in this very moment):
1. Olga's - my favorite "Greek" restaurant
2. Lake Michigan
3. wine country
4. 4 seasons
5. sailing
6. sales tax at 6% (it's 8.25% in Texas HOWEVER... we don't file state taxes)
7. hockey
8. a decent percentage of my friends & family are within driving distance
9. apple orchards, fruit picking, cider season, pumpkin patches & all that fun 'fall' stuff
10. bakeries - Milford bakery, Bridgman bakery, and all the yummy places in between for real baked goods

There are certain days when I do miss Michigan. I miss it on those perfect sunny days meant to be spent on the lake, sailing around between ports, stopping to shop & eat & enjoy the local atmosphere in places like Saugatuck and South Haven. I miss it when I get invitations to bridal showers and baby showers and know the cost for me to attend is more than I can afford. I especially miss it in the fall when everyone is wine tasting, apple picking, breaking out scarves & boots, watching the leaves change, going to WMU football games, and planning Black Friday trips to the minute. I miss Olga's with my best friends. I miss real Coney Islands too.

But the love of Texas... can I explain it? We had an incredible summer, with an absurd number of consecutive days where the temps reached over 100 degrees. The humidity keeps the skin supple & you don't go through near as much lotion during "dry" season. In a few hours, you can drive and be at the Gulf of Mexico, boarding a cruise ship or learning to surf. A few hours another direction, you hit the mountains and can ski for a weekend. Every small town has a Dairy Queen (which, to its defense, Milford had a DQ less than a mile from my house BUT it was seasonal where every DQ in Texas is open year round AND they serve hot food... I only go for the ice cream but still...) The Mexican food is made by people who are actually from Mexico. The 4 years of Spanish I took in high school actually comes in handy. In the time it takes to drive from El Paso to Houston, you can tack on an hour and be in Los Angeles (this is true - I checked it out... it's 11 hours from El Paso to Houston & 12 hours from El Paso to LA - that's how BIG Texas is). It blew Calvin's mind when he learned you can drive from Milford to Bridgman in 3 hours - that's all it takes to cross the state.

Other things I've learned: fashion is different. When my stepdad worked in Detroit, he had to wear a suit & tie to the office every day. In Houston? Slacks & a collared shirt. No one I knew in MI owned cowboy boots unless they worked with horses and legitimately found them necessary. In Texas? They're owned as fashion statements. I already have 3 pair. I traded in my stilettos for leather soles and ornate stitching. In Michigan, you rarely saw women totally blinged out - in Texas? Go into any Sam Moon, buy everything sparkly, and wear it together. Belts, jeans, jewelry, shirts, bags, flip-flops... the women here LOVE to sparkle!!

Calvin swears I'll be like that when I get older - sparkles & animal print.

Doubtful.

In the time I've lived in Texas, I have yet to go to a real club. In Michigan, you could find me shaking my booty and dropping it like it was hot fairly regularly - YET... I still loved driving out to the country - the STICKS - to line dance. In Texas? I had to have a man teach me to 2-step & half-step and understand what it means to be twirled around a dance floor properly instead of having some creepy guy grinding & sweating all over me. I'd love to go clubbing with my girlfriends sometime but I just don't know that clubs like that exist in Texas. Maybe in Dallas...

I grew up on sweet tea. My mom's family was from the south so she knew how to brew it right. I remember summer months filled with glass after glass of that sweet nectar - and she passed that right on down to me & my sister. There's a pitcher in my fridge at this very moment, which likely won't last until tomorrow. That was something I loved about moving to Texas - you can actually ORDER it in restaurants and enjoy it places other than home.

Also... I've always loved Dr Pepper. Moving to Texas and being closer to where it's made just makes it better. And visiting Dublin before it got shut down? Even better.

Until I moved to Texas, I had never even heard of "Texas Country". Now I've been exposed to a whole spectrum of music - a whole different sound - that I never imagined. I doubt, had I gotten married to someone from the north, you would've heard much country music at my wedding at all. The fact that our first 2 dances as husband & wife were to Texas Country just solidified even more: this is home now. This is where I belong. This is who I was meant to be.

I'm a Yankee Doodle who loves avocado, half-stepping, sweat & humidity, sweet tea, and football. And I had no idea until I moved down here what hardcore football looks like.

Come visit me :)

Being Fast

I grew up in the Baptist church (I'll pause for your gasps here)...

Not Southern Baptist, however. It was a small church in SouthWest Michigan - Woodland Shores. A sweet, small, family church where everyone knew everybody else. And for the most part, if you didn't attend Woodland Shores, you attended one of the 2 Catholic churches in town.

For it being a town where the average graduating class was 70 students, that's a lot of church.

I loved our church. I loved the family aspect, the Christmas Cantatas, the ladies softball team my mom played on, youth group, and a feeling of pride whenever I walked the halls or visited during coffee break (between service and Sunday school). Pride, in an 11 year old, when I stood on the stage as a bridesmaid for my mom's wedding. Pride, when I took vows with my stepdad, standing next to my little sister in matching pink dresses with puffy sleeves and bows & vine & floral wreaths on our heads. And love - love for a building I grew up with and a dream to someday be married there myself.

At this point, we all know I didn't get married in that church. I got married in a white tent in the pouring rain, in the backyard of some wonderful friends in the Lonestar State. But that's not relevant.

When I was in 8th grade, we moved out of that little town. I'd been attending that church since I could remember. All my friends had been my friends since we were in Mrs Z's preschool class together at age 3. It was a tough time, leaving all I loved behind. But I did. And it stank.

One reason it was so stinky was because once we moved to Milford, I became a spec of algae in the ocean vs having been a big ol' fish in someone's kiddy pool. There were 3 high schools in town instead of just 1 and there would come to be over 400 in my graduating class.

My mom was heartbroken after losing a church family that so openly accepted us for who we were and loved us unconditionally. In the 6 years my family lived in Milford, we never found a church we could call home.

All I ever knew was the religion I'd grown up with. I would sometimes go to church with a couple friends in college but it just never seemed right. While I was living on campus, I worked at the front desk and remember one certain Ash Wednesday telling someone they had a smudge on their forehead. They looked at me like I was an idiot (which I was, having not known really ANYTHING about Catholicism) and said "it's Ash Wednesday". I kept silent until I could get back to my room and figure out what that even meant.

In our church, we didn't talk about fasting. We didn't give anything up for Lent. I remember having a slumber party one weekend - my stepdad made tacos for dinner for me & my girlfriends. My friend Blair couldn't eat the meat and it wasn't until I was MUCH older that I learned why.

When I came to Texas, I hung around with my parents at a small church they found and even though it wasn't the perfect fit for me (there was, very truly, NO ONE my age who attended said church), it helped me find my way back.

And it wasn't until Calvin that I even heard the words "Church of Christ". This is also NOT an exaggeration. I was familiar with Baptists, Catholics, Episcopalians (my college roommate was one!), Jehovah's Witnesses, and a small number of other denominations but I had certainly never heard CoC.

My first visit to The Hills (what was then RHCC) seemed like a homecoming. People were friendly. The music was wonderful. We stood to sing and pray. I could take communion. Not to mention, it was the holiday season so having candles lit & a stage covered in poinsettias totally set the tone for me. And there were people my age - LOTS OF THEM!! It was wonderful.

A couple months later, Calvin talked about giving something up for Lent. I didn't participate that year (I was still living in Houston and still didn't totally understand the concept) but it gave me a first taste of what it meant to fast.

While it's not typical practice for CoC to participate in Lent, it is a valuable lesson to learn. For example, I gave up chocolate last year. Sure, it seems trivial but when you eat chocolate like I do, it's not a bad idea to give it up for a good 40 days. The year before I gave up sweets/baked goods and ohmygoodness, that was tough.

This year, I've opted for something less food-related. I choose to give up two time-wasting websites: Pinterest & Polyvore. I also gave up daytime TV (during the work-week). So far, so good. I miss Pinterest most of all but it has proven better for my work attitude to not waste so much lunch break time and it has proven better for my marriage to spend less time glued to my laptop in the evenings. The TV was becoming a distraction because I would turn it on to eat lunch and fail to turn it off until bedtime. I'm hoping the TV will become more of a habit - I don't let myself turn it on until 5pm. I honestly don't miss it because there's really nothing worth watching during the day anyway.

But I sure do miss Pinterest. I miss the recipes. I miss the exploration. I miss the craft ideas - especially since I get daily reminders from Jo-Ann's (via FB & Twitter) that March is craft month (convenient that I gave my crafty inspiration up during craft month).

HOWEVER... this is the lesson being learned - sometimes it's better to pull away from the computer (I realize the irony as I'm sitting here blogging) and engage in my own kitchen creativity or a conversation with my husband vs a quick turn of the computer screen and a "look how cute this is!" while he's absorbed in his XBOX 360 Master Scrolls game (side note: he gave up XBOX for Lent... we've been spending a lot more time together).

I speak to my mom on the phone more. We take the dogs for walks. The TV gets turned off and we do our devo. My kitchen is clean. The laundry gets done. It's just amazing.

I realize the season of Lent is to recognize sacrifice and gain a better understanding of what Jesus did for us. While subtracting chocolate and Pinterest doesn't quite measure up, I'm thankful for the opportunity to realize how much better my life can be - how much better my marriage can be - by choosing the ones I love over the things I love. This year's fast has had the most impact so far... hopefully it will be a reminder in years to come of what LOVE truly is.

The Color Purple

I go through these random phases in life where I become strictly opposed to certain (mostly fashion-related) things. To name a few: lace, flats, spaghetti straps, anything pink, Hello Kitty, horizontal stripes, denim skirts, and yes, the color purple.

Personally, I think it has something to do with a desire to stray from the crowd and be my own person. When pink was the "in" color, I loathed it. I stayed as far away as I could and opposed Elle Woods' line of "whoever said orange is the new pink was seriously disturbed". The PINK collection from Victoria's Secret began running rampant, which made me falter momentarily because I adore VS and didn't know how to handle it. If I shopped the PINK collection, I bought whatever I could in any other color.

Then one day, something shifted. The color pink began having more of a 'rock star' feel vs the 'little girl' feel and I purchased a waffle knit... it was all downhill from there.

I still will not say I "love" pink. Red has been my favorite color for years and Pink is simply Red's baby sister. Sure, she's grown up a little and has more of an attitude, but Red and I have a history.

Once my opposition to pink faded (nice), my crusade against the color purple began. Purple is the step-sister to Pink so it only made sense... not to mention, EVERYONE was in love with purple at this point and I felt a strong urge to continue my stance against colors with a red base.

I have no idea where I got these notions from. Having a background in fashion, it seems almost racist to oppose any color of the rainbow.

One day, while I was shopping, I found a dress I liked but alas, the only color left in my size was this eggplant purple. Against my better judgement, I took it to the fitting room, in an attempt to battle my color demons, put it on my body.

I liked it. I liked what it did with my hair & skin & eye color. I liked the way the dress looked on my body. I couldn't believe I'd been so opposed to something that now seemed so right. I bought my first purple dress and didn't look back.

Since then, I've been a bridesmaid in purple and can even be found today with purple toe & finger nails (I'm even wearing purple glitter) after a work retreat.

I've also since adopted a new attitude with colors: I can't be so judgmental - especially when it comes to all things fashion - because any color can work on any person with the right attitude and accessories.

Unless we're talking burnt orange. Gross.

Rock Steady

As long as I can remember, I have hated running.

I hated doing laps at volleyball practice. I HATED doing suicides in the gym. I loathed running a mile for the Presidential fitness test. I joined track in Jr high to spend more time with my friends & boyfriend and ended up assigned the distance events since I wasn't a sprinter and I definitely couldn't hurdle.

I always sucked it up, got it done, and finished last. I didn't really care either.

As an adult, I have friends who run. I could never understand people who CHOOSE to run - who pay MONEY to run - and who train tirelessly to travel places like Boston or Chicago to do a marathon. Why on earth would this appeal to anyone??

A couple years ago, my mom was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes. Since we lived under the same roof, I agreed to do the diet with her (it's always easier with a partner!) and we started losing weight. The dietician also told her she needed to introduce regular exercise into her regimen so we started walking. Eventually, we started biking too.

I loved the way it made me feel. I especially enjoyed the way it made me look. Mom was losing too and feeling better about herself. She was getting her blood sugar under control and I was fitting into clothes I hadn't worn in quite a while. It was great.

Months & pounds later, I met Calvin. The attraction was instant and I decided I was going to be his girlfriend.

A few dates in, he started telling me about his plans for a ski trip at the end of February. Told me they still had space for a few people and if I was interested, I could tag along. As a bit of a safety net, I got my sister involved and we planned to meet in Houston, drive to Fort Worth, and head on our way to Colorado with a group of new friends. 

"By the way," he mentioned, "a bunch of us are running the Cowtown 10K the morning before we leave if you want to join us." Of course I wanted to RUN with him!

Yikes.

My sister, one of those crazy runner types, was absolutely in so if I didn't do it, I'd be the girl who didn't run. Since I wasn't about to let THAT happen, I started running.

That was late January of 2009. I started slow, checking the mileage in my truck to see what the distances in our neighborhood were before running from my house. I'd gotten an iPod that year from my sister so I bought the armband and a pair of Adidas running shoes at Academy. I would walk for a song, and then run for a song. Walk for a song, run for 2 songs. Before I knew what was happening, I could run almost 4 miles without stopping to walk, which was great for me but not for a 10K.

On the day of the race, I nearly froze but I absolutely finished. Crossing my first finish line was such an adrenalin rush! I was proud of myself for finishing the race (even though I had to stop and walk a couple times) and I was excited to share my first race experience with my sister (and new boyfriend).

A few months later, our friends from Snyder were coming to Ft Worth to do the Zoo Run. Again, Calvin asked if I wanted to do it (it was only a 5K this time!) and of course, I said yes. I'm a team player! I even got my boss, Xio involved. She lived in Dallas and I knew she was a runner... 

From that moment on, it started to become a little something. Even though I didn't do many races in 2009, I decided to keep running and I even joined a gym.

In 2010, I got the job with Our Father's Children and moved to Ft Worth (hooray!). I had my membership with 24Hr Fitness and lived in a cute little neighborhood with Emily. A perfect neighborhood for running! I'd only been in town a few weeks before I ran the Dublin Dr Pepper 4K with some of my Ft Worth runner friends.

Later in the year (because let's face it - it's stinkin' hot in the summer in Texas!), Katie and I ran the Delaney Vineyard 5K together. 

A month later, I ran the Park Glen Turkey Trot.

That was the day I made a commitment to myself for a better lifestyle: I was going to run. Running is free, it shapes the body in ways a gym simply can't, and it gives me a chance to leave the house, clear my head, and get some fresh air. Not to mention, Texas is the state to become a runner since you can do it year-round!

I quit my gym membership for 2011 and decided that money would be better spent on entry fees. I was going to do 12 in '11 - one race a month, varying in distance, location, and cause. My plan was to work up to a half marathon and I'm proud to say, I ran that race on Thanksgiving Day.

Keith is a good runner friend. He did the Chicago marathon and is great for high-fives when he hits the turn-around and crosses my path at 20 minutes behind him.

In 2011, I had so much support from great friends everywhere, cheering me on, commenting on photos, giving me advice, and sending me links for races, it pushed me to keep going and meet this great goal. I lost 15lbs I managed to keep off and built confidence in my abilities for other things.

In addition, I inspired some great things. Emily decided to quit her membership with 24hr AND quit seeing her trainer to start running. I gave her tips on how I got going and she was off! It didn't take her long to sign up for her first 5K (which was the same day as my first 15K) and I couldn't be more proud.

*we both placed 4th in our age group!

When I started getting serious about running, my sister sent me a RoadID. I thought it was a little silly at first but with my penchant for night running, my solidarity, and my choice to run with an iPod vs my phone, it made sense.

After moving to Ft Worth, I needed to update the info on my RoadID and when I got on the website, I saw I had the option of having a 'motivational' line printed. I chose the words "rock steady" because one thing I learned in all my running was to keep a steady pace - if I started too strong, I'd throw my pace and quickly become miserable. If I ran the race for ME instead of running against all the other participants, I knew I could find my stride, keep it strong, and finish steady (with hopes of beating my own time).

For Christmas this year, Calvin ordered a new RoadID for me, complete with my new last name and the letters "HUSB" by his name and number. While he was placing the order, he asked what I wanted the inspiration line to read. I told him to pick something he felt fitted and surprise me.

On Christmas morning, I found a new style of ID and a tag with the verse 1 Corinthians 9:24. I looked it up:

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize"

I love this verse for a number of reasons:

1. The literal translation: run to win.

2. The biblical translation: self-discipline. 

3. The following verse: "...they do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever."

Running has changed me. It's changed me physically & emotionally, it's changed my outlook on self-discipline, on diet, and on life. It's molded relationships, it's strengthened friendships, and it's created a lifestyle I want not only for me, but for my family and friends.

Emily and I are doing 12 in '12. While we're not doing the same races each month, we are running. We're running to be fit. We're running to be strong. We're running for the t-shirts (and to justify the cupcakes!). And in 2012, I'll run my first marathon.

Although I doubt I'll ever be one of those "26.2" sticker people :)

How to be Daring

Today is Calvin's & my "2 Month-A-versary". While initially, some of you will consider this lame since 2 months in isn't really something to brag about, I choose to celebrate monthly for the first year of anything.

While nothing BIG is planned, I still recognized it verbally when the clock struck midnight last night. Calvin reminded me it really wasn't 'legal' until tonight but it doesn't matter. He was cute enough to recognize our "123 A-versary" (our wedding date is 12.3 so on 1.23 he gave me a rose and a really sweet card).

Two paragraphs in & I promise I realize how nauseating I'm being. Sorry. I'll press on.

Back at my bridal shower in October, I received an unexpected gift from my mom: the movie Fireproof and a copy of The Love Dare (this particular version is a year-long daily devotional for couples). I read Fireproof last year, so I was familiar with the premise of TLD but interested to see how they span a 40-day dare over a year for couples to do together.

Calvin and I committed to start the book after the 1st of the year. To date (it's Feb 3), we're on day 26. In our defense, there have been nights spent apart and others where I'm asleep way before he comes to bed. Also... I'm proud of us for getting this far. We're doing it and even in only 26 days, we're growing.

This book gives us some daily insight, a nibble of scripture, and either discussion provoking questions or a dare (or prayer) for the week. For example: this week's dare is to demonstrate patience by saying nothing negative to your spouse (it's better to hold your tongue than say something you'll regret). So far, so good. At the end of each lesson, we pray together.

In my life, over the last few years especially, I've witnessed the power of prayer. I had NO IDEA how that would translate in my marriage but let me just tell you, it is changing us SO much for the better and quickly. Seriously. If you don't pray daily with your partner, you should start.

Anyway... This devo has inspired me in the month of February to take things a step further. With Valentine's Day approaching and our honeymoon on the horizon, I wanted to do something special since I have the ability to love on my husband in a more daily capacity.

While I realize we're still very much in the 'honeymoon phase', I feel my actions this month go above & beyond anything I would do for him regularly. What you need to keep in mind is we've dated for over 3 years at this point. Yes, technically, we're still newlyweds, but there's not really anything NEW about our relationship (except the whole 'same name' & 'same address' deal).

My personal dare: To find ways to make Calvin feel loved in the 14 days leading up to Valentine's Day. Today is Day 3 and from what I can conclude, he hasn't quite caught on yet but that's also kind of the point. I wanted to do little things each day - different from things I already do - for him to experience that kind of gooey Feb 14 mush longer than just one day.

Here's what I've been up to:

On Wednesday, I tucked a pink note into his lunchbox he would later find (and instead of discarding, he brought it back to me in said lunchbox). On Thursday, I wrapped the blue sticky note around a single serve bottle of Red Diamond sweet tea - something else he would find in his lunch. The sticky note came home in the lunchbox too. I'm going to make M&M cookies (his favorite) to take with us to Lubbock this weekend... I'll wrap one up for him that he'll get tomorrow while we're at the hotel; the rest will go with us to a BBQ we're attending. Today he'll return home to find a pillow I made:

Pinterest inspired; I took some of the lyrics of our song/first dance and made a pillow for them to go on. Seems fitting on something of an anniversary... He has loved this song for years - he's actually the one who introduced me to it so it's not just some sappy love song I picked.

Here's the thing: so far, this project is costing me very little. I had the paper and the stuffing for the pillow. Sweet tea? Less than $.80. Fabric for the pillow? $.75 for half a yard at WalMart. The paint pen cost a little over $3 and the bag of M&M's were $2.68. Other things Calvin will find over the remaining 11 days:

Homemade Honeybee bookmarks. Also Pinterest inspired. I bought the Honeybee stamp (Martha Stewart collection) on a clearance rack at Ross for $3.99 with a store credit I had a couple months ago. On Pinterest, they used the free paint sample strips in pinks & reds & stamped them with hearts to give as Valentine gifts. I chose grays and yellows for Honeybee reasons but anyone who knows us knows I've called Calvin my Honeybee since the beginning. Currently we use our photographer's business cards as bookmarks (they have some of our engagement photos on them - we're absolute narcissists) and I think these will make good replacements. Cost to make them? Free. Since I already had the stamp...

Something else he'll find:

This man's boxer collection has grown leaps & bounds in the time he's known me. I love underwear. People who are close to me always get underwear as gifts and know I love something comfy from Victoria's Secret any day of the week. When Calvin and I first started dating, his boxers were solid colors, plaids, stripes, and checks. He now owns hearts, lobsters, citrus fruits, beer mugs, shamrocks, fish bones, and an ongoing assortment of fun underwear. I am a HUGE advocate of fun underwear. My favorite place to shop for his shorts is Old Navy - I recently bought these on sale 2 for $11.50 (normally $8.50 apiece) and am holding on to the second pair (turquoise with little red crabs on them) for his birthday next month. Again... purchased with a store credit I had. No money left my wallet.

Note: Please don't think I'm cheap - especially when it comes to Calvin. We're newlyweds on a budget and darn it, if I can save a few bucks, I'm gonna do it. Not to mention, we have an expensive trip coming up, his birthday is next month, and if I'm going to commit to 14 little Valentines, they're going to be budget-friendly. I digress.

To keep myself organized, I made a list of what I'm doing for him each day. I have to be careful in my planning because food is always SUCH an easy give but Calvin reserves sweets for the weekends only and sweets are the easiest thing to find in February! This is why I've had to get creative with paper goods and pillows... Anyway, later today I'll venture to Dunkin Donuts. This month, they're making heart-shaped sprinkle donuts (one of Calvin's all-time FAVORITE sweets) that I will bring home, tuck in a Ziploc, and present to him on Sunday morning while we're in Lubbock. If you'll remember, tomorrow's goodie is the M&M cookie and since we're also out of town next weekend, my little list has required quite a bit of planning.

Other things on the list: a framed wedding photo for his office (something we just discussed a few nights ago), a Valentine card, the boxer shorts, SweetTarts, a heart-shaped lunch (I got heart cookie-cutters for $1.47 at WalMart to cut the shape out and imprint smaller hearts in the bread of his sandwich one day next week), mini cheesecakes (a recipe I got from Nabisco Nilla Wafter FB page), ending our two weeks on Feb 14 at Across the Pond (formerly The Original Joe's on 26) for dinner. Across the Pond is where we had our rehearsal dinner.

The full dare I've given myself is to love this man deeply. I don't ever - EVER - want a day to go by where he doubts or questions the way I feel about him and our marriage. Sure, this 14 day deal is short-term and early in our marriage, but he'll remember it. And I know I'm setting the bar high for myself by doing this, but I won't treat our marriage like something I'll have all the time in the world for - God has plans for us on this earth and I can't plan on the next 50 years. God might bless us with that but if something were to happen tomorrow, I'll know I loved him as best I could today.

Happy Valentine's Month :)

Fashionisms

So the other day on Pinterest (shocking, I know) I saw a screen shot from the SATC movie where the girls are at Carrie's apartment and they're doing a fashion montage of all the great outfits over the years and it made me think about the things in my closet... over the years I've been willing to part with some oddities (those fashion in-the-moment Forever 21 disposable pieces that I've outgrown, the Abercrombie tees and pants that actually fit people once upon a time, the NY&Co wardrobe I acquired after years of working there and more recently, the Tommy Bahama island wear I was all too glad to sell off and never see again) but there are a few loves I just can't let go.

For example: my darling cousin Cristina got married in 2005 in Atlanta, GA. My then boyfriend (see: flavor of the month and purposeful 'seek to make X jealous' stand-in) was going to drive down from Michigan with me to attend the wedding. Of course I knew her big day was going to be quite an affair so I had to have just the right dress.

*NOTE* In 2005, I was 23 years old. I'd been out of college a year and a half (fashion major, no less), and had lost all that college weight so I was feeling GOOD about myself. Also... I stayed up late nights watching A LOT of Sex & the City on TBS before I started buying the seasons at Best Buy to avoid commercials and editing.

One of the things I was experimenting with at the time was well, everything. I wanted WOW and excitement when I dressed up and went out so I got it in my mind to make the dress for this wedding and the inspiration for it was...

...my bra. A bright orange lacy, pretty push-up bra from H&M. I decided it would look incredible with a gold skirt and I got to work fashioning together this orange bra with a gold skirt sewn to it and a little gold shimmery tulle to make it a tiny bit less obvious (at least in my mind) that the bra was the base (and display!) for this dress.

To top the look, that night, I wore great little Steve Madden gold sandals, a long strand of pearls I knotted and wore backwards (since there was so much bare skin in the back), a fabulous fake tan, and a bump in my hair that would make Snooki jealous (that's right - I bumped it way before anyone knew who Snooki was).

I turned some heads, slightly embarrassed my mother, and actually had a group of people from another table approach me to ask if it was mine (which is quite a compliment in the fashion world).

In retrospect, I believe I slightly embarrassed myself, my cousin the bride (who, in proper Southern belle fashion would never admit such a thing), and probably made that group roar with laughter at my expense later that night because the odds that they were genuine in their compliments are slim.

HOWEVER - I can't bring myself to open closet space by parting with that dress. Maybe I don't want to put it out on the world ever again (that was the only time I ever wore it) or maybe a tiny part of me has pride in such a statement piece because while I never had intentions of becoming a designer, for one night, I was.

Other items that live in my closet:

A red snake-print skirt I made to wear to prom when I was a freshman in college (I dated younger guys then... what can I say?). I was working at Jo-Ann's at the time and we had this fabulous, funky material that caught my eye daily. When I found out the theme for prom was "Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil", it only made sense to wear snake-print. I paired it with a backless tank I found at Frederick's of Hollywood (it had one strap that attached the sides in the back to the straps - it was awesome). And I got away with it since I was no longer a student. Sidenote: this was the first garment I ever had to install a zipper in. Win!

That skirt made another appearance a in 2010 as part of Mallory's costume when 5 of us dressed up as the Spice Girls. She was Scary. It was perfect.

My champagne BCBG NYE dress. In 2007 I made plans to visit a college friend who moved to New York (yes, she was actually working to DESIGN for a living). We bought tickets to a fabulous party under the bridge and we were going all out. I found the PERFECT New Year's Eve dress on BCBG.com and scoured the city of Houston to find it. Upon discovery, I hated it on my body but fell in love with this little number instead. I paired it with eggplant purple heels from Bakers (they zipped in the back and had little bows on them), a killer side pony, and jewelry from H&M. To top the look, I found a vintage Jordache faux fur coat (circa 1980) on ebay. I rocked NYC so hard Carrie Bradshaw style that I will never let that dress or the coat go. The shoes, however, will be missed (satin shoes & champagne simply do not mix).

A Western Michigan University Broncos hockey jersey, size XXL. My freshman year of college (2000), 1st semester, my roommate Megan and I had declared ourselves hockey fans and were determined to attend as many games as possible. One day, while browsing the racks and killing time at the bookstore, Megan and I discovered hockey jerseys - FOR SALE. Of course, the only way to justify such a purchase (since they were pricey & frivolous & we were broke college kids) was to offer up the exchange as early Christmas gifts for each other. SOLD. We each had our very own grossly oversized hockey jerseys. These days, I have nowhere to wear it but I refuse to part with it. Ever.

The Snow White costume my mom made me for Halloween when I was 5 (1987 for those of you who need the math). She painstakingly made this incredibly detailed costume she knew I'd only wear for one year - to school and to trick-or-treat. While this particular gem isn't in MY current wardrobe, it's tucked away somewhere at my mom's, being saved for a special day when she has a grand-daughter to dress as a certain dark-haired, fair-skinned, crimson-lipped Disney princess.

*disclaimer* obviously, this isn't me. I don't have access to pictures from that Halloween for the purposes of this blog entry.

My first 'designer' love - THE prom dress I insisted on hunting down... My junior year of high school, I was sitting in math one day flipping through a teen-driven magazine (let's face it - I hated math, I was terrible at it, and I didn't see the point in paying much attention near the end of the year) and my eyes stopped on a page of Alfred Angelo formal gowns. Immediately, I spotted a lilac velour spaghetti strapped dress, complete with jewel accents on the straps and glittery silver stripes. I WAS IN LOVE. Of course, I certainly didn't have the money for a dress like that. My parents definitely weren't going to pony up for it (when I went to prom previously, my mom made one of my dresses and my dad bought the other for me from Sears - certainly not designer but it sure made me feel pretty). My sister and I had a weekend with Dad planned and I pleaded with him and his wife to take me dress shopping. This is one weekend in my life I am certainly not proud of - we drove to nearly every formal-wear shop in the tri-state area, spending an entire day searching for THIS dress - a dress I wasn't even sure he would spend the money on because I knew it would be well over $200. Each store we stopped in, I became more deflated yet more determined to keep looking. I don't know why my whole family was willing to bend like this for me but my persistence paid off when we FINALLY found the LAST dress at a little shop in Indiana. It was a size too big but I didn't care. I convinced my dad that Mom could take it in and it would be perfect. I was in heaven! He actually bought it without much argument and I paired that gorgeous deal with elbow gloves and strappy silver sandals. I felt like a movie star in that dress, which was ironic because the following year, I played the part of an opera house owner in our school's big winter production. The dress re-appeared as my costume, complete with faux fur stole and a large, melodramatic personality.

And finally, the favorite item of my wardrobe I'll never let go of - a pair of Victoria's Secret cotton pajama pants. While I realize up until now, everything else has been 'special occasion' or 'absolutely random', these pants find their way out of my closet on a regular basis. Circa 2005, I was going 'home' with a friend for the weekend and tossed a quick bag together. The night we got there, I realized their family was big on "lounge wear" and since the pajamas I brought consisted of a tiny tank top and short shorts, I figured that was inappropriate to wear around the house. The next day, while we were at the mall, I came across these rock & roll pj pants and I bought a coordinating PINK thermal. While the thermal disappeared long ago, the pants have stayed with me, oversized and comfortable, and perfectly lightweight for summer evenings at camp in the break room. Two big reasons I'll never let these pants go: December 7, 2008 & June 23, 2011. On that day in December, I was wearing the pants with my hot pink "Frankie Says Relax" tshirt and washing off my makeup when Calvin asked me to be his girlfriend. On that day in June, I was wearing the same pants with my lime green Michigan Tech tshirt, sans makeup when Calvin asked me to be his wife.

These garments are like bookmarks for chapters in my life - I remember how they made me feel, what they felt like on my skin, the energy of the rooms I wore these things in, the looks & comments I received - these moments may not have lasted long, but the memories have lasted years. While I no longer work in the fashion industry, it will always be a passion I carry in my heart. Life may not afford me the finest labels or the latest trends, but I will always wear what makes me happy. And someday, maybe I'll have a little girl who wants to twirl in my dresses or have me teach her to sew. And if God doesn't bless me with a daughter, at least I have a hockey jersey :)